Well first of all I had my second day of Induction and tomorrow will officially be my first day in the Hospital on the ward. I am seriously excited after today's crash course in Health and Safety and Manual Handling I am really really looking forward to starting work. Even if I would kill to sleep past 7 in the morning at least once this week.
Anyway, on to better more wimpy things, I mentioned in a few posts before that I'm kind of a little bit in love with this guy that I know, Ed thinks that I should just come out and tell him how I feel, I was tempted today, had the speech going over and over in my head, I was prepared but I didn't do it and I don't think I will. For several reasons, the fear of rejection is too strong, he's already expressed to me that he is looking for love and doesn't understand why girls don't like him, I don't want to tell him how I feel and he just goes along with it because he's that desperate to know that he's not on his own. I would make the worlds worse girlfriend, seriously, I ain't thin or pretty I don't like girly movies and pretty dresses, PDA is just not me, it wouldn't be fair on him or me. One of us would be trying to hard to be right for the other. The cons just outweigh the pro's too much and I don't want to go back to seeing him online and we just don't even bother with each other. So I suppose I didn't wimp out, I just over thought it and let it change my mind. If it was meant to be then maybe I'll get another chance in the future.
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